Im back to work. While it is nice to have something to keep me busy with, its still hard. I see moms everyday. I wander into the baby section of my store and look at all the newborn clothing, thinking how much I want to be buying the items.
We are ready to try again. I don't like the fear I have inside me, which makes me hesitate, and I don't want pregnancy to become an obsession. Im torn.
I still haven't had enough determination or bravery to share the baby's story. That will come. That is something I am sure of. We have had ups and downs, and good days and bad days. My son is starting to ask more questions again-I suppose as he crudely learned about death, as he understands more, his questions evolve. I love answering him-he truly keeps his brothers memory alive with me. He does not live in fear of death-six year olds are lucky.
